pPROM and Incompetent Cervix

So much has happened already this new year of 2011. After over a year of traumatically losing my daughter to pPROM, I have discovered that my cervix has been incompetent. PPROM is complex and it happens for numerous reasons; every mom experiences the rupture of membrane under her own unique circumstances. I had the IC on the back of my mind just because my RE examined how odd looking my cervix was. Then my new OB's nurse practitioner also identified the same observation in January. I was frustrated to not fully understand why my cervix was in a bad shape. She looked through my records and connected my condition to the hysteroscopy when the cervical fibroid was removed back in '08. I remembered that OB suspected a cervical polyp but it turned out to be a fibroid. I think he briefly explained that a deeper incision had occurred due to the fibroid but of course, what did I know back in 2008 about my body?! I only wanted to conceive so desperately and none of this made sense to me at that time. After I changed OBs for infertility issues, I only recalled the term "polyp" and kept referring to that procedure as a polyp removal....
Mid January I had a phone consultation with Dr Haney in Chicago who specializes in TAC. There were two moms that I know personally who had TAC with him. He had no doubt that I had pPROM'd from IC. I discussed TAC (transabdominal cerclage) with my new OB and she completely supported this decision since she already had one of Dr Haney's TAC patient. She also measured my cervix as short but wasn't sure if her measurements were accurate. My OB described how a portion of my cervix was "gone" or effaced. I couldn't go with Dr Haney's date in April - it didn't seem worth the wait when there was another skilled doctor in New Jersey. So here I am typing this blog the day before my TAC surgery with Dr Davis in New Jersey. He also examined my cervix and it was even shorter than what my OB described. Not only that, my cervix was tender and weak which shouldn't be for someone who's NOT pregnant. If my cervix was this weak, then there was no barrier such as a protective mucous plug that could have protected the pregnancy from bacteria. I had placenta previa - maybe the placenta was infected first causing the rupture. Dr Davis primarily does post-pregnancy TACs but he emphasized the advantage of pre-pregnancy TAC for me under my circumstances. I am relieved the timing of this is all working out.
It feels like redemption to finally know what went wrong after losing Joey but I have to admit it hurts...I wish this was not the way my life went. I wish I was able to change every event to save her. I am trying to remain hopeful for another child while I miss Joey so much. Tomorrow I will be TAC'd.